(Apr. 30, 2015) As I've mentioned in previous posts, I've spent a lot of time in my life trying to "figure it out." I'm always trying to crack the code on lasting happiness, how to achieve my dreams, and come up with a sort of structure for life that I can operate in. The trouble with that is, is that life really depends on your perspective. You can try to be positive, but what happens when you just aren't feeling it that day? Are you a failure? Will you never get what you want? I say no. What I've realized through experience lately is actually adding to my happiness in a profound way, and that is self-acceptance. I've realized that I am human, I am a woman, and I am changeable from one day to the next. I'm not talking about extreme mood swings, but I do realize that I am going to feel differently about certain things from one day to the next. And that I'm really just doing the best that I can. And that I can exist in a space of not knowing for a little while and be ok. Desperate attempts (or even a long term commitment) to figuring things out just doesn't work. I know that I won't give up on my dreams or my quest to evolve, but I can move towards what feels good with ease instead of hunting for answers. Besides, a certain framework for happiness might work for one person and not for me. I just need to stay in touch with the part of me that is connected to God, who I really am, and live from that truth. The more I continue to avoid what is toxic in my life, and steer towards what I know fills me up in a good way....the happier I will be on the road to my dreams. It really is as simple as that. Plus, when I am connected to who I really am, and not coming from a place of fear or lack, I feel so much closer to my dreams. It takes away needing to rush things because I already feel good.
This week I would encourage you to stop trying to box yourself in if that's something you find yourself doing. If you think things like, "as soon as I..." or "once I have..." or "maybe x is the answer..." I would suggest giving yourself a break. Accept who you are, and where you are at now. Be gentle with yourself. Get in the flow of what feels good in an easy way. Let go of others' ideas and judgments about how you should be. Start trusting yourself enough to know what's right for you on a deep level. Being compassionate with yourself will eventually lead to self-acceptance. We don't all feel great all of the time, and we aren't always our "best selves." But as we accept ourselves as is, and lean into better feeling thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, we actually begin to change without berating ourselves. I have found that bringing in more of the good is so much more effective than deprivation. Cultivate pleasure, and immerse yourself in what you love. I promise, you will begin to feel better, no matter where you are at right now. This is my wish for you and my continued wish for myself <3